Stolen Goods

Have recently started letting boy out of the trolley when shopping. This quite often comes down to a shocking life or death moment involving boys curiosity and the travelator. It also means he now has access to everything on the shelves.

 I reckon I owe hundreds to supermarkets for broken, half eaten goods cunningly shoved to the back of shelves. Yes, I am one of these Mums who lets their kids eat the grapes from the bag BEFORE I have paid.. I make no apologies.. the happiness of a toddler in a supermarket is something that concerns EVERYONE. This has however created problems now he is free to stick his dirty little paws into the food. Found him with his finger testing the squidgyness of a raw sausage. Great. If I'm not on the ball or in my usual half asleep state I will forget that I need to do a sly U-turn to avoid the pick and mix... This is the incident that made me have to change my shopping route..

Boy is literally helping himself to handfuls of pick and mix, ignoring the hygiene implications of this my main concern is how to extricate the evil little hyper jellies from his hands without him having a full- on emotional breakdown in the middle of supermarket when I have a full trolley (3 weeks overdue). I did what any self respecting, caring and emotionally fragile Mother would do.. I said this.. in a whisper..

"Just eat them quickly so no one sees and don't do it again"

I watch in shock and admiration as my tiny boy shovels these evil little sweeties down his throat thinking 'Yep, thats gonna bite me on the arse at bedtime tonight when I'm trying to poke him down of the light fitting with a broom'

We approach the till.. I'm a little nervous I'll admit.. thinking Please don't ban me for being unable to control my child. All is good, the man puts my stuff through the till and I feel smug... until I hear a little voice I recognise say
"Look man LOOK what MUMMY GAVE ME"... and out of his little pocket, squished into his hand is a few quids worth of pick n mix. Man looks at me and the best I can say??

"HAHAHAHAHAHA, does that count as harbouring stolen goods?!"
These are not good words to say, loudly in a supermarket.